Many of us regret the past that is gone and are anxious about a future we can not control. This creates the most pain humans experience, the antidote is living in the present moment.
The present moment is the only moment that is truly available for us. Nothing ever occurs in the past or the future, things only happen in continues stream of present moments.
The past is really a collection of present moments that have passed and the future is a collection of present moments that are yet to occur.
Pain is a self-created inner resistance to external things that you can not change or when you are unsatisfied with how things are and you feel unable to change it. This cycle creates what Eckhart calls the “pain body” which can take control when you are dissatisfied about something or someone.
The reason why humans sabotage themselves is because of the “ego”, a part of your mind that can control your behavior without you even noticing mostly due to the fact that it can not be easily observed.
The ego wants to be the most important, it wants to control your experience, it wants others to play by your rules, it was others to please you and satisfy your needs and expectations and if we are not careful, it can create distress and suffering because everything the ego wants is virtually impossible.
This is one of the many reason why it is important to separate ourselves from our minds. The mind creates pain. The best way to dissociate ourselves from our minds is to identify who we are to more than just the mind and what it is inside of it. The body, the soul, the spirit, the existence, and the experience.
Living in the present moment can also dramatically improve your relationships. You will be able to stop debates with endless cycles, judging, criticizing, or trying to change others. This way of living will undoubtedly bring calmness, tranquility, and peace into your life.
All this does not mean that you can avoid pain and suffering at all times, it just means you have the choice to live in that state most of the time, we will feel everything without choice, but what persists and the state we live in most of the time will be up to us.
Living in the present does not mean you live a passive live, to the contrary, it means you decide and change things now.